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“Um…like…totally CLUELESS” outfit

With themes based on 90’s movies, it’s been a blast from the recent past at Story Story Night this season. Like tonight was CLUELESS: Airhead & As If Stories.

I usually exploit my outfit as my first joke/theme intro, and I really wanted to call this one “Cher from Clueless Becomes Hillary Clinton’s Stylist,” because no one rocks a matching, totes profesh two piece (slash pantsuit) like those two ladies. Unfortunately, though I searched most of the thrift stores in Boise at the last minute looking for a yellow plaid pantsuit (because, like, duh, perfect Cher/Clinton synergy), I only had a red plaid combo that Hillary would likely never be caught dead in (because Republican red state fashion bias) that I had to make into a Cher-style mini-skirt with safety pins and duct tape. Also my only knee highs are super weird and look like a wild animal clawed them up on the sides. My red Gucci bag is a definite knock-off. And since I don’t quite have Cher’s thigh gap, I had to sit down very carefully with the aid of a shielding red hat. But the very long explanation of the thought process surrounding this outfit ended up being pretty funny, and like, totally clueless.


Pendelton red plaid painsuit (which is actually long enough to wear to an actual business meeting if you take down all the safety pins and duct tape), I totally spaced where I bought it, and how much it was, but suffice it to say: thrift store, cheap | Matching red plaid hoop earrings, ummm…like also a thrift store? I’d say, Idaho Youth Ranch, for like $2 | Steiger blue heels with brass eyelets (Made in Brazil), for like, I think $7 and some random change from ReStyle, like totally.

Song of the Night: “Valley Girl” by Frank Zappa


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