All posts tagged: featured

“Mary Ann boinks Thurston Howell III behind the palm trees” outfit

Sorry, Lovey. Sometimes, undersexed on your ensemble-cast deserted island,  you catch a glimpse of each other on the cabana. No matter what the class and age difference, sometimes, things get a bit heated on Gilligan’s Island, like any undiscovered slice of paradise. Hers: Timing sheer red & white polka dot tie top made in Vietnam – $4, ReStyle thrift store | Gloria Vanderbilt black camel-toe-inducing cotton shorts – $5, Serendipity second hand boutique | Steve Madden black braided leather flats – $5.95, Idaho Youth Ranch thrift store His-before: Pronto Uomo Navy blue blazer made in Italy, $275 – International haberdashery forgotten \ Coastal paisley patterned cotton short sleeve button up, $12.99 – Ross Dress for Less | Hurley surf trunks, $60 – Kauai, HI circa 2006 \ Rainbow leather flip flops, $45 – San Clemente, CA circa 1996 Then the paparazzi come and ruin the fun for everyone.His-after: Cremiux Sleepwear blue premium cotton post-boinking robe, $150 – Dillards | Passages pinot noir CA circa 2015, $6.99 – Grocery Outlet bargain market (uhh, huh) Hers-after: Tropical bed head and a bad reputation.

“Nice day for a (black +) white wedding” outfit

Friday night, after Ryan and I came home from a gorgeous love-soaked/heat-stroke of a black + white rooftop wedding—too exhausted to take a Cheep photo—I slept in this (sans the hat). I woke up at 6:20 am, sweaty cakey makeup and all, thinking, “What the hell why not. Just put on the hat.” I struggled in the half-light for awhile, almost giving up, then this gorgeous glow infused everything for a time-ticking/camera-dying number minutes. Behold, I finally witnessed the golden hour of the morning. I don’t know if I’ve ever been this up/productive this early. Nice day (post a black +) white wedding. (Cue Billy Idol.) Calvin Klein black cotton w/ white stitched breast pocket – $5, Idaho Youth Ranch thrift store | vintage 1960s Sears Millinery white straw w/ black velvet ribbon hat -$25, In Retrospect |  DKNY platform wedges – $20, Idaho Youth Ranch thrift store The red Apocalypse Now chair is mine. I am slowly creeping in over the threshold. Cheep it up.

“American Revolution” outfit

These colors don’t run. They just become easy targets. “Where are your war-time, manners, sir?” the startled British asked with dying breaths, done up in red, scarlet as the blood issuing from a blue-blooded redcoat. BCX black pinstripe taking-care-of-business vest – $5, Idaho Youth Ranch thrift store| Sharagano button-up red cotton spandex skirt – $4.95, ReStyle thrift store | b.tempted blue lace & cream bra w/ cream front bow (inopportunely visible from different vantage points, just like a proper British soldier) | Steve Madden black braided leather flats – $5.95, Idaho Youth Ranch | Accessories… “Kirin” Laurel Burch black, gold & mauve peacock earrings – $10, Serendipity Boutique | locally made “Nasty Girl” iron ball-chain necklace  – post-election gift from a girlfriend | Navajo hand-made hammered brass bracelet – $40, Albuquerque, New Mexico, street vendor in “Old Town” Happy Independence Cheep!

“Cultural appropriation at its whitest” outfit

It’s not quite a feather headdress at Coachella, but it’s got some pale-ass(hole) interloper, Native American cache.  I went to Canyonlands in Utah last week, and hiked a trail called Aztec Butte (that I pronounced “Aztec butt” like a 13-year-old every-time I read it, but only in my head, because I have class-act self-restraint). These Puebloan granaries once held the life-sustaining provisions of desert-crossing native travelers. Now, they provide Instagram-aiming photo backdrops for desert-crossing white tourists. #manifestdestiny? Sideout Hawaiian floral print dress – $5.95, ReStyle made in USA! USA! (“Someday we’ll incorporate you into our fashion, and that’s reparations enough” – national slogan to the disenfranchised) | California Floppy Hat – gift from someone I don’t remember, made in USA! USA! | Grenedene gold flip flops – $10, Nordstrom’s Rack (appropriated from Ryan, who bought them for me) Cheep it up, all you travelers. 

“Cashmere, lace, gator, fur & feathers” outfit

Plus passing cat. I fell in love a spell ago so fell off of Cheep. Eep. Meet Ryan’s house—and his velvet painting underground. I temporarily loaned my apt. to a lovely pair of musicians, Music Box, so this is my new studio. Love. I mean LOVE. Jack Bloom California olive green wool jacket w/ fox fur liner – b-day gift from Ryan $80 @ 20% off for skirt/suit set, In Retrospect | Neiman Marcus cream cashmere sweater – $5,  ReStyle | Heart Soul creme lace skirt, $4, ReStyle | Frye Boots – $400 minus $200 Xmas gift from ‘rentsCheep, love. (Plus cat.)

“Velvet Underground” outfit

In the thick of the most intense snow and ice storms seen in Boise in decades, every morning I send a heat-seeking missile into my closet to find the thing that will cover me most thoroughly. I’ll forsake fashion for warmth like a caveman, when the temperature drops below 20 degrees. Fortunately, there’s plenty of velvet jumpsuits, in the case of my particular closet. Like I’m a sexy 70’s cavegirl, found perfectly preserved (and voguing) under this ice block. vintage 1970s Ronni Nicole Petite by Ouida black velvet jumpsuit – $30, Red Light Clothing Exchange (Portland, OR) | Banana Republic cream lace camisole, ReStyle, $3 | leopard print rubber boots – gift, from Jane Newby (New York) | Black & gold arrow banded belt – $0.94, ReStyle thrift store Cheep Jane.

“Pilgrim’s progress” outfit

“From This World to That Which Is to Come; Delivered under the Similitude of a Dream” – subhead of Pilgrim’s Progress Why is it—with all our privileged pilgrim’s progress and all our fever dreams of thanksgiving—that we always have to look back, repeating, “What have we done?” vintage, label cut off sheer tan & pink tie-collar peacock dress – $35, Pursuing Andie online vintage boutique | vintage Lorraine bright pink petticoat – $3, ReStyle thrift store | Minnetonka studded leather boots, some gift shop place in the deserts of Utah (last season sale), $30 Vinyl of the day: Blood on the Tracks – Bob Dylan Cheep, all you pilgrims.