All posts filed under: Mind

[BREAK-UP DIORAMA III] Living Room / ‘Shelter From the Storm’

Make some sense of this. Read the Museum Plaque Introduction» It was in another lifetime, one of toil and blood When blackness was a virtue and the road was full of mud I came in from the wilderness, a creature void of form “Come in” she said “I’ll give you shelter from the storm.” —Bob Dylan, Shelter From the Storm (Blood On the Tracks) [Figure i: Overview. The carpet wars. It was their first relationship standoff. She hated the carpet. It seemed to have existed there for 30 years to collect intractable dirt, fray at the hallway to reveal only a naughty tease of hardwood, and eventually annoy her to hell. Besides, carpet was plastic and she despised plastic. She eliminated it from her environment like a pogrom. She was a decor dictator. She dispatched her enemies, no matter how ruthless and cunning she had to be.] And if I pass this way again, you can rest assured I’ll always do my best for her, on that I give my word In a world of steel-eyed death …

[BREAK-UP DIORAMA II] Bathroom / ‘Buckets of Rain’

Why’s Bob Dylan in the toilet? Read the Museum Plaque Introduction» Buckets of rain Buckets of tears Got all them buckets coming out of my ears Buckets of moonbeams in my hand You got all the love honey baby I can stand. —Bob Dylan, ‘Buckets of Rain‘ (Blood On The Tracks) [Figure i: Overview. She had been in man bathrooms before. She knew what they could be like. But this was another story. This bathroom was bar none dis-gust-ing. The ceiling and walls were splotched with blights of mold. The bathtub was potentially unsalvageable—the white of the porcelain unseeable, caked brown. She felt dirty after sitting on the toilet, after taking a shower. Before she moved in, his friend Scott took a razor blade to the shower walls, then rooted out and replaced the moldy caulking, telling her, “I just couldn’t imagine you living here like this.” It was certainly the worst of it. It took her two days of solo painting. First a few layers of Kilz. Then the cover up. She choose deep purple …

[BREAK-UP DIORAMA I] Bedroom / ‘Visions of Johanna’

What, pray tell, is this? Read the Museum Plaque Introduction» Ain’t it just like the night to play tricks when you’re tryin’ to be so quiet ? We sit here stranded, though we’re all doin our best to deny it And Louise holds a handful of rain, tempting you to defy it —Bob Dylan, ‘Visions of Johanna‘ (Blonde On Blonde) [Figure i: Overview. She remembers that last night here, which was not the last night here, not by a long shot, but that last of the long lonely nights waiting for Godot, or him, as it was. It was the night she had decided. And when such a thing has been decided it was decided. It was over. She just needed to say the words. And when she did, he shrugged. It was decided. She just needed to say the words.] Lights flicker from the opposite loft In this room the heat pipes just cough The country music station plays soft But there’s nothing really nothing to turn off Just Louise and her lover so entwined And these …

[the BREAK-UP DIORAMAS] Museum Plaque Introduction

i. A five-year installation, the BREAK-UP DIORAMAS are part decor slideshow and part emotional memory as can only be communicated through a Bob Dylan soundtrack Bob Dylan has carried me through every breakup, like Jesus on the beach. This one was a Blonde on Blonde and Blood on the Tracks breakup. In my mind (alone, I assure you), in my final days there, each room in Dan and I’s home took on a song from one of these albums. This could be worse. I once had a Highway 61 Revisited and Time Out of Mind break up. Caustic. Dark. ii. Dan and I broke up in June. After much extended agony. We made it public in July. Finally, in late August, after a nail-biting apartment search, I moved out. Only then, we stopped pretending nothing had changed. We stopped. Full stop. We had dated for six and half years. I had lived with him for five. iii. A breakup is a fugue state. It’s a David Lynch movie. You have lost the thread. You are disturbed, disoriented, …

Tax Day

Sometimes, bombs go off, and you don’t even realize the impact they’ll have through all the smoke and chaos and initial “WTF happened?”. Meaning sometimes, it’s not the Apocalypse but the Aftermath that really stings, that lingers in the air—often invisible but still noxious, clouding your senses.Vinyl of the day: “So runs the world away” by Josh Ritter. The fallout feels like fog. I owe(d) thousands to the IRS. To me, numbers are painful realizations that make self-employment feel like Sisyphus-style self-immolation. Fortunately, there’s food. And silk. And vintage “pearl” neckties. And Dan Costello. Even, and especially, on tax day. I don’t even know how he does it. He took the scraps of haphazard, neglected and wilting vegetables and over-exposed-to-the-air tortillas and made magic happen. We got this cast iron dutch oven somewhere for some such cheapness (Dan will remember and I’ll ask him later and then delete this part with just a cheap-ass number and you will forget this sentence ever existed. Poof. Like magic). All this became Black bean & radish fried tortilla pie.Then …

Cheep story-time EARTH

[Prologue: So this is the story I wanted to tell tonight at Story Story Night. I left a few crucial things out in the live telling, but that’s the nature of the beast. But, from what I’ve learned, the journey is the destination, anyway. So spin it however you want. I have abbreviated names to somewhat to protect the innocent, and the not so innocent.] This is a story about wildness, and wilderness, and about what really happens when you sow your wild oats, and are later forced to reap that sometimes bitter fruit. For me, the wild sowing really started when, at 20, I fell in the love for the first time with my first lover, perhaps the worst possible person to pair with my virginal, idealistic young soul. Let me explain. My upbringing was very sort of Dr. James Dobson Focus on the Family Christian. When time came for sex ed, it was abstinence-only all the way, baby. We used to have these sex ed books for young Christian teens. They were chose …

The epic Rockies’ dress + lightsaber duel

My industry, which is advertising (I am an independent copywriter), holds one epic, no-holds-barred awards show every year. Called the Rockies, the event serves as Idaho’s first stage in the national Addy competition, and also as a forum for the 350+ ad peeps in the state to get completely blotto en masse in as little as 20 minutes. In true Oscar’s style, the organizers pair up presenters to introduce each category and announce the winners. Magically, and probably because I host  Story Story Night monthly without having vomited once, I was asked to be a presenter along with the elites of the agencies. I persuaded my independent designer friend and Armor Bijoux dealer (tagline: “Jewelry for the fashion war.” «We wrote that together. Brilliant.) Bethany Walter to join me on stage. Rarely do we get these sort of epic dress-up opportunities. I knew I needed something dynamite. And, three weeks ago at Repeat Boutique (500 South Vista Avenue, Boise, ID 83705), I found a vision of wearable vintage art. The craftsmanship and thought that went into this dress is unbelievable. I modestly refer …

Story-time: Cezanne in Russia

I’m a story addict. Seriously. I dope myself up on the stuff until I just can’t take anymore and then I take some more. I especially like when people read stories aloud. I listen to David Sedaris and Anthony Bourdain (my current out-loud favorites) books on tape over and over and over again until their petulant yet hilarious voices permanently seep into the drywall, emitting the odor of sarcasm. It’s a reason I am a co-founder of Story Story Night. Free, unfiltered access to stories every month? Yes, please. So today, I’m introducing a new feature called Cheep Story-time. This will feature original non-fiction and fiction stories by yours truly, Jessica Holmes (or as Dan points out I say on Story Story Night podcasts “Jess-ka Holmes,” or as once known to my then toddler sister “Ca Ca”), a self-acclaimed serious bad ass writer. And they won’t be boring, promise. They will be good stories, read loud. Cheep-tainment, baby! AUDIO: Cheep Story-time by Jessica Holmes: Cezanne in Russia The above story recounts my move, as a naive, …

Cheep backgrounder

Starting a public-facing blog begs self-examination. I think things like, “Seriously, who do you think you are? What do you know about any of this stuff? You think you’re a simulacrum of Tim Gunn and Padma Lakshmi and Anthony Bourdain and those Brits from Changing Rooms (the much better BBC precursor to Trading Spaces. And yes, I watch too much reality television) on a die-hard budget. But who are you really? A nobody.” Well that’s just it really. I am a nobody, and I felt like one nearly all my life. I wasn’t born with a 75% off Calvin Klein jumper on and a fabulous art-deco mobile over my vintage crib. I was a shy, utter depressive from the age of 11 to at least my mid-20s (RIP, soul-raking sadness). I dressed in rotations of cliché awfulness: like a hobo, like a punk, like a preppie conformist. I ate meat and potatoes and once-frozen vegetables for dinner nearly every night, along with all the processed crap that makes up the blighted American food landscape. I …